Serene (Shattered Book 3) Read online

  Stanley’s kiss was different from any other kiss I had ever shared in my entire life. Deep and mind-blowing, it was like a volcano that made steamy liquid flow all over me, burning everything in its way.

  Back then, I couldn’t even begin to imagine how much that kiss would change. It changed my nights, my mornings and my life in general. It changed me.

  As if chasing every small thing that I was feeling at that moment, he made each and every one of them grow stronger. His lips devoured mine, slowly, inexorably. There was no place for thinking, not a chance to run away. There was only him, challenging my insecurity, my fears, making sparks turn into fireworks and simple kiss into something so much bigger, larger than life itself.

  Lacking of air, I broke the kiss to take a breath.

  With his forehead pressed to mine, he touched my lower lip with his finger, as if he couldn’t believe what we just shared and wanted to make sure I was real.

  “Splendid,” he whispered into my mouth. “I didn’t expect less than this.”

  I didn’t know what to say, still tranced after the kiss he gave me. Thoughts went wild in my head.

  “I want more,” he said, breathless. “So much more than this.”

  Knots of excitement tied in my stomach. Every inch of me tensed.

  “This is insane…” Was the only thing I managed to say aloud.

  Panic and lust fought inside me. He could press just a little harder and I would give up and let him do whatever he wanted to do with me. Seeds of temptation that he had planted within were so hard to ignore. My resistance started to shatter.

  “Don’t push me away, Ivy,” he said, still standing close to me. His palm slid down my side and rested on the small of my back, when his other palm caressed my cheek and then slid to the back of my neck.

  I could feel his chest rising and falling; his rapid breathing feathered my lips.

  “Even if I wanted to, I don’t think I would be able to push you away. From what I can feel, you are like three times bigger than me, and like ten times stronger.”

  His lips smiled against mine and he tightened his embrace around me. “I’m being serious, Ivy… I don’t want to stop at one kiss.”

  “Then how many kisses would you like to steal from me?”

  “All of them. I want all your kisses to be mine.”

  “How very selfish of you.”

  “Not feeling guilty.”

  “I can’t promise you anything, Stanley…”

  “But you can promise me to at least think about it. Will you?”

  “I’m one hundred percent sure I will not be able to stop thinking about you, especially after the kiss you gave me… Which is a very tempting memory to replay in my head.”

  Even though I couldn’t see his face, I knew he liked my answer. “Which means I did a great job, right?”

  “Oh, you…” I punched his chest slightly. “As self-assured as you are, I doubt you ever lessen the significance of your seduction tricks.”

  “Well, I’m a good kisser. But it’s not a crime, is it?”

  “I don’t even want to think about the number of women you’ve kissed to perfect your skills.”

  In a whisper, he asked, “Jealous?”

  “What?” I puffed like he just said the most ridiculous thing in the world.

  “Not jealous. Okay.”

  “You sound like you are disappointed to hear that. But it’s not like I’m going to fall at your feet because of one great kiss that we shared.”

  “At least you admit that it was great. Next time will be even better.”

  “Next time?” I laughed. “Not so fast, Dr. I haven’t decided anything about the next time.”

  “Yet.”

  I shook my head and bit my lower lip, fighting the desire to initiate another kiss. “I mean it, Stanley. I don’t want to rush things. We barely know each other. And…”

  “Ask me anything.”

  “What?”

  “Come on – ask me anything you want to know about me.”

  “All right… Favorite color?”

  “I have two – green and amber.”

  “Favorite song?”

  “King of Wishful Thinking.”

  “No way! Just don’t tell me Pretty Woman is your favorite movie.”

  “No. It’s Star Wars.”

  “Favorite season?”

  “Fall.”

  “One thing that you would never do?”

  “Bailout.”

  “Favorite way to relax?”

  He giggled. “Do you really want to know that?”

  “Okay. Never mind. Next question…”

  “Wait. Do I have a right to ask a few questions in return?”

  “Later. Favorite dessert?”

  “The answer would be the same as to the question about relaxation. Again, do you want to hear that?”

  “Jeez, why do men never stop thinking about sex?”

  “I didn’t say it was sex. You did.”

  “Right. Because I know that your answer would be the same.”

  “Not true.”

  “Oh, really? Okay. What’s your favorite way to relax?”

  “Starting last Saturday night, it’s you. Everything I need or want to do, I want to do it with you. Including relaxation, or things with lots of kisses involved. And that last part does not necessarily lead to sex, you know?”

  “Right,” I said with as much doubt as I could put in one word. “I’m old enough to know what lots of kisses can lead to.”

  “Okay, we’d better talk about something else, because with the way you react to my words about kisses, my pure intentions might turn into not so pure, way too fast.”

  “See? Men never stop thinking about sex.” I took a step back and sat down on the couch. Stanley took a seat on my right. He wasn’t touching me anymore, which was intentional I guess, but the warmth from his embrace from a few moments ago, still warmed me up.

  “Is there anything else you would like to know about me except how fast sharing kisses with you will turn you into my obsession?” He asked in a foxy manner.

  There was something in his words that radiated so heavily, like his words were liquid seduction that seeped through my skin and turned my every argument into nothing; like I was suddenly unable to defend myself from the magic his voice reveled inside me.

  “Have you ever been in love?” I asked, trying to understand what made me ask that particular question. It’s not like I wanted to hear about his ex-girlfriends or heartbreaking stories he shared with them. I guess a part of me simply wanted to know if people who were not searching for love, could actually feel it. I was one of them too, maybe a little too overprotective when it came to my heart, but still hoping, if not intentional, find someone able to melt the ice covering it.

  “Many times actually,” Stanley said. “But I never loved anyone as much as to spend my whole life with that person. I think falling in love and loving someone are two different things. I still hope one day, I will be able to feel this difference.”

  I leaned against the back of the couch and sighed. “There was a time I thought my love to a man was the strongest of things I would ever feel. But there are weapons that have enough power to destroy people without blood-spitting. They destroy hearts and souls and turn them into nothing...”

  Stanley stayed quiet for a long time. I didn’t speak either.

  I never told anyone how much Kean’s betrayal hurt. As if losing my vision was not enough to ruin me, he walked away without saying a word. Like I didn’t mean a thing to him anymore. Like I was nonexistent.

  “After the accident, I felt like this blind hell would never end…” I spoke in a quiet voice, not sure why I suddenly wanted to share my memories with Stanley. “At times, dreams were so vivid. When I woke up, it took me a few minutes to realize they were just dreams. In moments like that, I didn’t want to live. All I wanted was to sink through the floor and never take a breath again. Later I realized that weakness was my only enemy
. I needed to find the strength to fight it and I succeeded.”

  Moving closer, Stanley pulled me to his chest and said, “What you did deserves admiration. Not everyone can find the strength to kill their inner demons.”

  I smiled sadly. “Not all the demons are dead, unfortunately.”

  “What does it feel like – to be unable to see people and things?”

  “It has its advantages. I can feel everything so much better than those whose eyes are healthy. I don’t know how to explain it, but when a new person approaches me, I begin to ‘scan’ him or her. Their voice, their scent, the way they make me feel. I don’t have a choice but to rely on how I feel about them. Whether I’m comfortable in their presence or not. One thing I love about blindness is how strong you can feel everything that is happening around you. I might not be able to see the sky, but I can always tell if it’s gonna be raining today.”

  “Really?” He chuckled. “Next time instead of watching the weather channel, I’ll give you a call.”

  “It’s the air that helps me feel the changes coming. The temperature and the fragrances I can so clearly smell everywhere I go. Sometimes I wonder if all those strong feelings would become weaker if I got my vision back.”

  “Speaking of which… Is that okay if I ask a few professional questions about your state?”

  A surge of familiar panic ran through me. I hated talking about the medical side of my state.

  “It’s incurable, if this is what you want to know.”

  “How do you know that? How many doctors have you talked to?”

  “Enough to know that my vision is as lost as a beautiful dream in the first rays of the morning sun.”

  “Do you mind if I…have a look at your medical history?” He paused and waited for my response. Something was telling me that he had been afraid to ask for my medical history. In any other situation, my immediate response would be ‘I do mind’.

  But to Stanley I said, “Only if you promise me to not make any promises. I’m fed up with doctors saying they could try helping me and then telling me it was all for nothing.”

  “Okay. I promise I will read it and if there’s nothing I can do to help you, we will forget this conversation as if it never happened at all. Deal?”

  “Deal.”

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  Stanley

  “I thought Ivy would be here too,” Crystal said, walking into my living room.

  “I told you I never supported your idea of joined dinner.”

  Liam chuckled. “She’s blind, not stupid. If she wanted to eat, she would go somewhere she wouldn’t feel like being interrogated about how she managed to seduce your ’innocent’ brother.”

  Crystal made a face.

  “Give me a break guys.” I walked to the bar and poured two glasses of scotch, one for myself and one for Liam. “We just met and I don’t want to rush things. Besides, she’s not just a random girl I want to spend a night with.”

  Liam crossed his arms and watched me carefully. “There’s something you are not telling us, Stan.”

  “You know even more than I wish you knew.”

  He and Crystal shared a look.

  “You wanna help her, don’t you?” My sister asked.

  Oh, she knew me so well.

  “I don’t think it’s possible,” I said, sipping my drink.

  “What does her medical history says?” Liam asked.

  “That I was being a fool, hoping it was curable.”

  Right after I got back home last night, I opened Ivy’s files and started reading them, page by page. By the time I got to the last page, it was almost four in the morning and I felt like nothing on earth. I read the files again, then again. But it didn’t give me even a tiny thing my hope to help Ivy could hold onto.

  She was right after all, there was nothing I could do to help her get her vision back.

  Crystal sat down on a chair next to mine and rubbed my back gently. “You can’t save everyone, Stan.”

  “I know. But hope springs eternal.”

  “There are things you might not be qualified enough to change,” Liam said. “You are not an ophthalmologist.”

  “I wanna show her records to one of the doctors I used to work with back in the hospital. He performed several successful operations in the sphere. Maybe he can tell me something I haven’t read on the Internet yet. And trust me, I’ve read every damn website that described cases similar to hers.”

  “Every case is different,” Liam said. “You, of all people, should know that by now.”

  “This is exactly why I keep hoping for the best.”

  “If you need my help, I’m here.”

  “Thanks, man. I still have no idea how to help her, but if there’s at least a small chance I can do it, I will not let it slip through my fingers.”

  Just then, my cell phone rang.

  “Hello?” I said into the handset.

  “Mr. Burke? It’s Fiona, remember me?”

  “How can I not?” I smiled at the sound of Mrs. Sparks' voice. She was Ivy’s neighbor from downstairs I met last night. Her daughter owned an apartment right next to Ivy’s and as far as I knew from the conversation I accidentally eavesdropped while waiting for the elevator, she was going to sell it.

  Fiona spoke again, “Millie thought about your offer and she’s ready to make a deal.”

  “Really? That’s wonderful news!” I stood up and started passing the room impatiently. “When can we sign the documents?”

  “How about Tuesday morning?”

  “Perfect. My lawyer and I will be there by 10 in the morning. Will that do?”

  “Yes, sure. Thank you, Mr. Burke. See you next week.”

  “See you.” I hung up the phone and smiled at my sister. “I’m moving out of here!”

  “What?”

  “I have found a different apartment and I can’t wait to move in there.”

  “Wait. What’s the rush? I thought you liked your place.”

  I grimaced. “Never liked it actually. But it doesn’t matter anymore. I hope the new owners will have more luck living here. Now, I need to start packing.”

  “Right now?” Liam asked.

  “Yep. Will you help me guys?”

  “Don’t count on me,” Crystal said, rubbing her growing belly. “The only thing I can do is sign the boxes. Do you have boxes to pack your stuff into?”

  “Shit… I don’t.”

  “Then, I guess, no packing is happening tonight.”

  I cursed aloud. “You are right. Packing will have to wait until tomorrow.”

  “When did you manage to find a new apartment, anyway? I thought you were busy working in the clinic.”

  “It was a spontaneous decision. I mean, I’d been thinking about finding a new place, but last night, when I was leaving Ivy’s…”

  “Wait, you were at Ivy’s last night?” Liam asked with unhidden curiosity in his every word. “What were you doing there?”

  “Eating. But what I was going to say was that I heard her neighbors talking about selling one of the apartments in that building, so I went to look at it and I loved it.”

  “You loved the apartment or the fact that it’s in the same building as Ivy’s?” Liam asked, smirking.

  “Both.” I smiled.

  “Oh, dear Lord…” Crystal shook her head. “You are losing your mind over that girl.”

  “I am not. It was just a lucky coincidence that her neighbor wanted to sell the apartment that I just so happened to need so much.”

  “Right…” Doubt flashed in my sister’s eyes. “So now you are going to do what? Follow her every step?”

  “I’m not a stalker, if this is what you are hinting at. I just want to… Know more about her and her life. That’s it. And don’t even think about saying ‘right’ again. I know you guys don’t believe a word I’m saying. But I’m being honest with you. You are my closest people in the world. Why would I be lying to you?”

  Again, the two of them share
d a meaningful look.

  I rolled my eyes. “Whatever. Seriously. Think whatever the hell you want.”

  “Well, thanks for the permission,” Crystal said. “Just one more thing, Stanley… Don’t do anything that might hurt her feelings. You know what I’m talking about. She has suffered enough in her life. She might not be realizing how dangerous the game you two started playing is. But in this particular case, you will be the one responsible for how it ends. Think twice before you let yourself into her world. It might be a little different from what you expect it to be.”

  “I know what I’m doing, Crystal. I’m not going to hurt her. All I want is to spend a little more time with her.”

  “Even if your time with her will have limits?” Liam asked.

  I didn’t want to think about limits. A part of me knew that Crystal might be right and Ivy didn’t realize that letting me into her life would lead to the unknown consequences. I, myself, had no idea why I couldn’t stay away from her, step aside and let her live her life, without me. All I knew was that right now there was no power in the world capable of keeping me away from her.

  “How about we talk about something else instead?” I thought changing the subject would be good, considering the more we talked about Ivy, the more I wanted to be with her now. “What did Mom and Dad say about your baby-on-the-way news?”

  “Dad said he would spend all summer with them, at the lake house.”

  “So he’s sure it will be a boy?”

  Liam smiled. “At least one member of your family is on my side.”

  Crystal spoke, “But Mom is sure it will be a girl. I don’t know how she knows that. She says I look just like she did when she was expecting me. All I know is that I can’t wait to hold my baby in my hands. I don’t really care if that’s a boy or a girl.”

  Liam walked down to her and placed a small kiss on her lips. “Neither do I.”

  I smirked. “Liar.”

  The night dragged on, my sister told me about the design that she and Elizabeth came up with for the baby’s bedroom. Liam said he stayed out of it because he wanted to live. Both of them looked happy and excited to see the first pictures from the upcoming ultrasound.

  After our family dinner was over, I walked them to the parking lot and wished them a safe flight back home. Crystal looked a little worried, and even though she tried to play it cool, I knew her worry had something to do with me. I wondered if she still thought I shouldn’t let things with Ivy go too far.